A melancholy day.
I've been feeling a bit melancholy today; in the past week, I have lost two people I love very much.
Last Thursday, my sweet grandma lost her battle with leukemia. She was diagnosed just under a month ago, and now she's gone.
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It all seems like a blur to me. I had talked to her on the phone right before her diagnosis was confirmed, and she'd wanted so badly to feel better and to watch her great grand babies grow up.
Her funeral was today, but due to bad weather, we we're unable to make the three-hour trip, which was a bit hard for me to swallow.
I then found out last night that an uncle of mine passed away this past Sunday of suicide.
This was a man who loved people and was extremely fun to be around.
He was a man who loved Jesus, but was a tortured soul addicted to drugs.
He would get help and do good for a while, but he'd always seem to veer off track time after time after time.
I haven't seen him in quite a few years, but I have many fond memories of him, for which I'm very grateful.
I've been thinking a lot lately about how short life really is, and how we never really know if we'll see tomorrow.
And I'm realizing that we can't wait until our loved one is on their death bed before we begin to pray fervently for their salvation.
When I had that last conversation with my grandma a few weeks back, I had no idea that would be my last conversation with her.
I knew she was sick, but I thought sure she'd be around long enough for us to go see her. But she wasn't.
I know she's heard the gospel, because my dad shared it with her many times, but I don't know if she ever came to the faith. And that's a question that's haunted me day after day since she died.
I've come to the conclusion that I have to trust God with that unanswered question, because only he knows, and me fretting over it isn't going to change anything at all.
Add to this day the cold and the gloominess, and yes, it's been a very melancholy day.
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Posted in Recreation and leisure Post Date 05/28/2017